Soo i have been thinking after reading the comments. I think there has to be a healthy balance when providing for children. Some parents create different kinds of enabling habits and end up raising societally handicapped adults. Too much or too little is never the answer.
I read TT’s comments and i thought about it. I was the opposite of the character she described. I was emotionally handicapped, and over independent. It was very hard for me to see people for what they were or are. I didnt need people, God forbid i had to ask for help. I still have a problem asking for help.
The only relationships that my attitude didnt affect were my work ones. I thought i knew God and he awesomely favoured me. At 23, i owned 2 houses, by 27 i was almost worth a million usd. From my labor- i worked expatriate for a multinational for years. I had it all, or so i thought. The jet set life, unlimited vacations etc. I finished my MBA and had plans to buy a Birkin for myself as a reward, but i fell short of graduating with a perfect GPA..3.8 on a scale of 4. I settled for humongous diamond earrings instead. Like TT”s friend, i was hard to get along with for many men. Because my attitude was what exactly is a man going to show me i havent shown myself?
Then the markets crashed, my networth halved, my liquidity got shittier. I lost my ginger so to speak. I am still looking for the hustler in me. I started adjusting to people and i finally met my husband. Thank God he saw something in me with the exception of the eagle thats soared and was now eating the humble pie.
I am still learning to let people into my space, learning to be dependent on others. I am learning to ask for help. Sometimes i wake up in cold sweat thinking i have to go look for a regular job, but the truth is my husband meets my needs and is happy to do it, so i am learning to relax a bit till my school opens.
One thing i am also learning is to do for and give to people who absolutely can do nothing for me in return. I am closer to my core as a human being, learning its not really about what i feel, but what i do and what impact i create. I am learning that sharing is caring and being less emotionally dependent on my bank account balance.
I wish all the christians – Anglicans and Catholics a “reflectful” lenten season.