So i finally got back to blogging this beautiful Wednesday morning here in Lagos. Hope your weekend was more restful than mine. On Saturday, my nephew’s 1st birthday was in full effect at Playbarn in lekki 1. We managed to keep it small and intimate, no crowded parties for us these days. The food was good, way too much candy for the kids, the MC was fantastic. I might bring you pictures later. We had a winnie the Pooh themed party.
Fast forward to Sunday, i decided to honor an invite to Snika’s church since he had been inviting me since forever. If you know me well, you will understand my hangups about the Pentecostal churches in Nigeria. That’s all i choose to call them, hangups. Anyways i went halfheartedly, but with many reservations. It was a special service with a guest minister – Dr Sam Chand. Lets just say i came out with a better attitude. He said a few things that i realized i never really understood about being an efficient human being. I just always thought vision and execution was key, but never really understanding that executing a vision puts one in a leadership role. In essence the whole catch was that to grow a be an efficient human being, there are things one must understand about capacity – leadership, pain (your threshold for pain must be very high) – not necessarily physical but emotional because many people will hurt you along the way and you must be able to overlook it, exposure, character, failure and risk. They all sort of tie in together.
I guess we tend to take a lot of things for granted when we walk our life journey’s. I choose to make mine a lot more purpose driven. I have gotten the initial name approval for my school which i intend to start in Lagos, and i am scared shitless, because that means i must have a structure in place by June 2014. I guess my hand finally got forced. I haven’t fully worked out when i am leaving my job, or where the money is coming from, but i understand it is time to buckle up and pursue that goal. Where there in no risk, there is no success. I keep telling myself that daily. More so, no failure is fatal, and its the risk of failure that keeps many towing the usual lines.
Later on Sunday i attended another event. Yes i was really that busy. Awesome Treasures event at Muson Centre, ran into an old friend from JSS – DO nice seeing her. The theme for the event was marriage- what is a real man? I think we have flogged the issue of marriage so much in my generation in Nigeria, that we are totally confused as to what a man ought to be. For me a real man is two words – accountable and responsible. Women need to stop making excuses for men as mothers and partners. It reminds me of someone i dated in the past whom i am glad the good Lord my God helped me get rid of in the most painful but memorable way possible. His mother was too busy making excuses for her almost 40 year old irresponsible son and trying to make it appear i was the strong headed party. Whenever he couldn’t pay his bills, she paid them, and this was a connected man doing business (side slang for i wanna wake up whenever and do whatever when i please – pretty much a life that lacks discipline, focus or vision). I had to tell his mother point blank, i stood to gain nothing from that union as i was even hemorrhaging financially because of this lout. Yeah it makes me a lout that i also tolerated his BS. My mother doesn’t make excuses for her sons, she calls them to the side and cautions them. Do not raise a man who becomes a nuisance to the woman who is to share the other portion of his life with him.
I went to the gym on Monday, i cut on Tuesday to go to Bogobiri. Will tell all about that. I made a new old friend. Might have found a new running partner.
Sorry for this long epistle. NESTR