Singles Tale I

So as we remix and remix this community, I have started getting submissions. I want to say thank you for your support. Today’s is a singles tale as experienced by “issababygyrl4lyfe”! Enjoy!

Young,Female and Dating

So i’ll be bringing you stories of my beautiful dating experiences.

Honestly the only way to make it through this dating scene is to have fun with it. Hopefully your readers can help me decide if to “bust it” or “2nd date”

So as a young naija babe in my early 30s, my family and friends and mildy (friends) and seriously (mom and aunts) concerned about my single status. They have all taken it upon themselves to intercede on my behalf.
So no surprises when I get a call from one of my correct married female friends. I recently convinced her to join a gym and start getting her workout on. I mean this is the fitfam era, get fit or die trying. She’s like “girrrrrrl I have found your boo oh”.

I’m bumming on my couch and ask for more gist.
So this is how it goes

– Dude comes over to her, trying to make conversation with intention to toast

– Friend laughs and tells him shes a married woman but she has a cute,intelligent, single friend

– Dude is like for real?, let me see.

-She’s like nah i’ll vet you first before moving fwd.

– Friend collects his name and number for vetting process.

I’m like eheeeeen. Na so you carry my matter for head. Sha she does preliminary vetting on google (Name, marital status, location, degree and work) and they check out. She asks if she can pass on my number. As I am learning to be open and less “PICKY” , i give the green light.

My friend comes back to me that he’ll rather meet in person first, when am I free for a date. Date is set, we are having light dinner and drinks after work. Interesting though he wants my friend to be present.

So we agree if he’s an ass we’ll both leave him at dinner, if he’s cool she’ll make an excuse to leave early.
It’s D-day. Me and my girl get to the restaurant at 7.24pm and 7:29pm respectively for a 7:30pm date. Oga is no where to be found. We order drinks, chit chat, and still no oga. Being the foodies we are, we order our food and begin chopping. Food was amazingly delicious. Still no oga.
My friend sends a message asking dude where he is. He responds saying he’s stuck at work, the person relieving him from his shift called out and they are trying to find a replacement. (Calm down, you saw shift and want to abuse him. He’s a medical worker in a hospital).

Sha 2 hrs later we have finished eating, gisted with our lovely waiter, listened in on an aristoz convo (dude looked like the babes grandfather) and laughed at another convo where dude was trying to wiggle his way out of friend zone, still Mr. Gym is still missing.

As we are hugging and doing the double cheek kiss to say our goodbyes, Mr gym calls. He is finally off. Meet us here, meet us at another spot closer to home or goodnight everyone. He wants to go home and shower.

He asks if we can meet up the next day. I tell him no. I have other plans. My friend told him he’s a joker.
So people should I bust this guy? Or give him a 2nd chance to redeem himself.

– Yes his absence was work related, but his poor communication skills can manifest himself in other annoying ways. So let’s hear it……..”

As submitted by Issababygyrl4lyfe!

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6 Comments on Singles Tale I

  1. Hmm…it’s a little bit dicey here.
    I’m put off by his poor communication skills…another part of me would call his behaviour ill-mannered.
    Yes, you want to keep your options open but you shouldn’t set yourself up to be taken for granted.
    I’m also a little bit worried about him wanting your friend (who he was interested in) to be present on a blind date.
    Does he genuinely want to meet you or is he doing it because of your friend?
    All in all, I believe in 2nd chances…so my 2 cents is this:

    Lean back a little and let him do the chasing. If he calls regularly and seems genuinely interested in another meeting with only YOU…(this is the 21st century…you’re grown adults. .you don’t need a chaperone)…then I’ll say give him another chance..but if he messes up..good bye!

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  2. Hmmn this guy ehn, too many commas for him, first he wanted to meet in person with your friend, then he stood you guys up and waited for your friend to call, then finally he wants to go and baff before coming. abeg it’s not by force jare. you or your friend shouldn’t say anything to him. if he’s serious he should prove himself.

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  3. *If I have free time, I would be curious to see him in person and hear him out; see how he asks for forgiveness, but he has to make a lil effort to set up the date*

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  4. chrisyinks // July 25, 2017 at 12:06 // Reply

    First, glad we are having submissions…..I guess the pynk360 family is growing and becoming more of a community.

    Personally, per dating and relationship, I tend to think different people have different deal breakers, hence it may be sub-optimal or even counterproductive to use other people’s subjective definition of ‘tolerance’ to serve as your yardstick. This opinion holds when we aren’t dealing with a case of flagrant disrespect for the other party in situations like domestic violence, infidelity et al.

    To the case at hand, I tend to be goal-oriented and would be open to reasonable compromises to achieve the defined goal. In your case, the goal is to get hooked up and that may mean forgiving (overlooking) some one or two mis-steps. You really haven’t gotten a chance to evaluate him to make an informed decision on whether he’s a good fit for you. Busting him now means you wouldn’t be able to do so. However, like you said, he could have better handled his no-show (which I feel you should point out if you guys meet), and like others have mentioned, his weird request of wanting to meet with you and your friend as against only you.

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  5. Let’s see his next move. He needs to redeem himself. If he does, 2nd date it is..
    If he doesn’t put an effort, good riddance.

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  6. I will suggest that you sit back and watch how much effort he is going to put into trying to get another date from you.if his efforts are convincing enough,a second date should not be a bad idea but if he acts otherwise,then au revior to him!

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