A Year Later

It has been a year since my traditional wedding and I write this with mostly good feelings. I am grateful that my marriage has been uneventful in a good peaceful way and that we didn’t have issues with adjustments of living with each other, personality clashes etc. I pretty much don’t have any horror stories to trade- if anything maybe funny ones.

Life has thrown a few interesting curve balls, but for the better part I am grateful.  I told my husband – we have many good things in our lives and home – maybe with the exception of crazy money which I believe will come sooner or later.

We still don’t have a wedding album- I am responsible for this- so I have promised him by the 2nd year we should have one. Lol.

I love my husband and my marriage- one thing I wouldn’t have done in hindsight is a traditional wedding. While I didn’t foot the bill, the money could have been put to far better use. I keep asking myself what the relevance of this particular event is especially after a family introduction. Can the bride price not be paid at the introduction or formal (white) wedding? In Lagos where you will easily expend N5 million at a minimum for a decent event, are these things worth it? For starters I know fully well I don’t know 1200 people, My husband doesnt either…so who invited them? Anyway some pix for your enjoyment
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Please share your thoughts on this- if you are married did you have an engagement / traditional wedding? How do you feel about it? If you aren’t married what are your thoughts? Will just one event do?

Winners Wednesday is still HERE

NESTR
OAD

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22 Comments on A Year Later

  1. You really looked beautiful and you look like your mum.

    I’m not yet married, but my sisters all had huge weddings, more than 2000 guests.

    For my traditional, i plan on letting my parents have their way, for my white wedding though, i dont think i want more than 100 guests(hopefully).

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  2. Awww…You were a beautiful bride…Wish you many more good marriage years

    Am just having a white wedding wenever am getting married

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  3. Beautiful bride…I was even about to ask if that was your mum in one of the pictures.

    I had a traditional wedding ceremony too (I am Igbo, and my people take that one way more personal than the white wedding ceremony o). We were expecting just about 100 guests, but about 400 guests showed up on that day. The whole thing was just exhausting, but it was a fun experience.

    I initially wanted a small ceremony with just about 10 people or thereabout, but my husband and dad wanted a slightly bigger ceremony, so i had to give in…..

    My issue with traditional weddings especially in anambra state where i come from, is that there is a rule that you must travel all the way back to your village for the ceremony, else it’s not valid. Prior to my trad, i had only been to my village twice, so travelling all the way back was a big deal for me o…. If i had my way, i would have done it here in lag.

    I’m yet to see a tribe that doesn’t do trad, i think it’s a Nigerian culture thing….

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    • Nkechi – travel back ke? You people have been answering them, thats why they have mouth to talk. Yep that’s my mom oh. The whole wedding concept in Nigeria is tiring to me because we have all this fanfare but many times no one actually helps us prepare for actual marriage – I feel even many of the churches don’t get it right in their counselling etc.

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  4. Congrats on your anniversary.

    The trad wedding for me is important. I think that’s when th parents officially give their concent and bride price and all is exchanged. However, I do not want a big wedding. I have been begging my parents in advance since 1900 but they won’t burge. I just hope I don’t runaway as soon as d rites are done.

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  5. Awwwwwww you looked beautiful and I like the colours you wore.
    Congratulations on your anniversary! God bless your home.

    I agree with you on the expensive cost of Nigerian weddings.

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  6. Happy anniversary, here’s wishing you many more peaceful,happy years together.
    Your gele is a dream- where did you get it? please drop the vendor details.

    I got married ages ago and thankfully I had an introduction/ engagement after a court wedding. Well attended but zero stress on me because my parents sponsored it.

    As a Yoruba girl, our tradition should be upheld and preserved- it’s a beautiful one that should be encouraged. The only downside is the financial implication especially in our economy today.

    I’m with you- it would’ve been awesome if your folks gave you a 5M cheque to start a new life and then arrange an intimate ceremony rather than have a grand ceremony and y’all be broke a year later.

    I’ve missed commenting on this blog, hope you’re well?

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    • Browncoco – the gele was direct from a weaver – i got the small crystal stones at a craft store in NY, then I showed my 5 year old nephew where to place them and we glued it down. lol.

      N5m was an understatement – I saw the bill for that event and I can’t publicly say how much it cost. I would have bought a flat easily somewhere between Gbagada and Lekki and might have change left self.

      Welcome back to commenting – we are dandy oh!

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  7. Congrats, you were a pretty bride. Wishing you the best

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  8. Beautiful Mrs….

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  9. Happy Anniversary Mr & Mrs Pynk. Beautiful pictures.

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  10. Awwww you looked too cute for words. I had only a trad and a court wedding. My trad wasn’t big which was exactly what we wanted. Less than 150guests tho we were aiming for 60 lols. I think formal wedding is just to fulfill all righteousness. This Naija sef only one person, trad, court, white… oh gah.

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  11. Happy tradiversary :). I loooooove me some traditional weddings. Love the display of culture, the funny moments, silly jokes. Its less predictable than white weddings.

    Looking to have about 150 pple at my trad. may the forces be with me

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    • Bee May the force be with you truly…for the most part we stayed ignorant on the trad part…even though they kept trying to rope us in.

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